When Expansion Derails (and Why That’s Not a Sign You’re Failing)

It feels almost baked into us—that hope to arrive. To reach the destination. Completion. Enlightenment.
Are we there yet? (Spoiler: No. And we never really will be. But also—yes. Because being present, truly present in new ways, can be incredible. And it can be enough.) Expansion derails are a lot of things, but they’re not necessarily failing.

Still, that itch to “get there” persists, and we’re constantly thwarted. Life doesn’t let us arrive neatly at a perfect finish line. “Perfection ain’t the point” my comedy altar ego Tina T says. And on top of that lifelong tension, there are the deeper derails—the gritty thoughts, the rogue emotions, the sheer exhaustion of being human in these wild times.

Maybe it’s the solar flares.
Maybe it’s just what happens when we grow. Expansion invites breakdown as much as breakthrough.

I still love The Big Leap by Gay Hendricks. He names those sneaky ULPs—Upper Limit Problems—that pop up just when you start to level up. They’re old patterns that try to yank you back into your comfort zone. Or that need healing before leveling up. In my 20s, a psychologist friend told me growth is “two steps forward, one step back.” Honestly, sometimes it feels more like “faceplant into the mud while trying to climb a mountain in the rain.”

My Recent Derail during an Expansion – Spin Cycle

Yes, I had one of those moments recently.

I’d already set some ambitious intentions for myself this year and spring season increased the intensity. Then I decided to take on Dr. Elson Haas’ Spring detox—a month-long cleanse on four levels: physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual. I’m no stranger to this territory, but this time I uncovered new insights and challenges. Add a Full Moon in Scorpio to the mix, and…voilà. That gentle “step back” felt more like I’d fallen into an emotional quicksand pit.

Here’s a little unpacking of that derail—it might spark some helpful reflection for you, too.

What Caused the Derail (Retrospective Wisdom Edition):

• Trying to do too much too fast (but this is the perfect time for a deep dive detox, right?)
• Uncomfortable insights from deep dives (hello, comfort food stuffing emotions – what? really?)
• Realizing parts of life need change, space, or healing (stress management practice reset, round 109)
• Things beyond my control (thanks, Scorpio moon, for spotlighting the shadows)

What Helped (Eventually):

• Using the tools I teach—yes, even dialing down slightly from “FFFF” helps (6/10 versus 8/10 matters)
• Channeling (though I deleted the recording mid-mess… and regretted it)
• Rest—naps and burrowing under covers like a cat
• Support—my mastermind group helped me name and normalize the crunchy bits
• Taking smaller steps (plodding prn!) – and showing up for the meaningful work I do

What I Learned (Again and Again):
Derails don’t happen because of one thing. It’s usually a pile-up: lack of sleep, skipped exercise, too much sugar, someone’s offhand criticism, a planetary storm, and oh yeah, the collective stress of this era. All of it stacks.

That’s why I believe expansion requires layers of support:

• A foundation of daily wellness practices
• A mix of tools—body, mind, heart, and spirit. Time mgmt., mental health hacks, energy healing tools.
• A community of friends, chosen family, and collaborators
• Frameworks for understanding what’s happening
• And sometimes? A coach or therapist to hold sacred space and help you move through the hard parts more smoothly, instead of getting stuck in quicksand or headbanging

The Invitation:
This is a constant dance. If you’re sensitive, creative, or deeply intuitive, your expansion needs to include recovery time, nervous system care, and support for growing into greater visibility and impact—without losing your center.

Right now, I’m reworking my own schedule to include more sanity, more dating, more community, and more creative expression. Because expansion doesn’t just mean working harder—it means living more fully.

So I’ll ask you:

What do you need when expansion is happening?

If you’re navigating a big shift—or longing for one—I’d love to support you. My Spring Coaching Special is open now for those ready to expand into more radiant work, deeper life balance, and sustainable soul-aligned success.

Let’s make space for your next leap… and the inevitable wobble that comes with it. Check out the spring special, the Radiant Work Power Pivot.

Get started – Set a time for a free consult.

Big love,

Denise

PS Here is a recent client’s experience:

Radiant Work Power Pivot client success story:
The layers you helped me uncover – that’s exactly what I was hoping for – holistic career coaching!

I was just so undecided, hoping for the guidance; where do I go next? Trying to narrow that down, to get my brain on the proper track. I had gone through a lot of overwhelm and stress at work, and thought, “OK, I need to do something”. The Radiant Work Power Pivot helped me look at things differently, take a more realistic approach, instead of just running around in circles. Doing the pre-session workbook, answering the questions, was huge!

I enjoyed the meditative (energy healing) aspect of the Radiant Work Power Pivot. You have an uncanny ability to sense what the heart and brain are wanting and looking for. In one meditation you had me go deeper and ask my brain and heart about my purpose, and images came instantly. And then, that power symbol for the next steps also came in strong. You are very gifted to bring that amount of detail out into the open for me to ponder and dig deeper.

Now I’m more on the lookout for what makes me feel joyful. I think this would be ideal for anyone to get a different perspective, even if they think they’re enjoying their job. To get them to tune in, to figure out what gives them what they need at work, to make their job even better, or to decide to go for another job.

Coming from a quality perspective, continuous improvement is something that you would do, not just in the workplace, but also in your life. You should always be looking to expand your horizons and improve upon yourself, improve your life, in whatever ways you can. I’ve changed so much over the years, just by trying to make that continuous improvement. The layers that you helped me uncover – that’s exactly what I was hoping for when I first started looking for a career coach.

Kim Jakway, Lead Quality Engineer May 2025

Learn more about The Radiant Work Power Pivot – A timely Life and Career Coaching expansion support zone